


As a gift

by strawberriesandtophats



Category: Discworld - Terry Pratchett
Genre: Canon Disabled Character, Gen, Hogswatch, dogs and puppies
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-05
Updated: 2020-12-05
Packaged: 2021-03-10 02:41:54
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,292
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27896995
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/strawberriesandtophats/pseuds/strawberriesandtophats
Summary: “Is everything ready?” Madame Meserole asked Drumknott, who nodded seriously. The anteroom was empty, outside it was raining buckets. They clanged off the roof, everyone outside had taken cover.
Relationships: Roberta Meserole & Havelock Vetinari, Rufus Drumknott & Havelock Vetinari
Comments: 22
Kudos: 36





	As a gift

**Author's Note:**

  * For [gemothy](https://archiveofourown.org/users/gemothy/gifts).



> Original title: COVER LORD VETINARI IN PUPPIES 2020

“Is everything ready?” Madame Meserole asked Drumknott, who nodded seriously. The anteroom was empty, outside it was raining buckets. They clanged off the roof, everyone outside had taken cover.

“Certainly,” Drumknott said, just as Charlie came into view, already dressed as his lordship. There was not a hair out of place, he was smiling so cheerfully that it looked rather suspicious. His nails were painted blood-red in the holiday spirit.

Drumknott handed Charlie the clipboard, on which was a short summary of what he should be aware of when standing in for his lordship during the afternoon’s appointments. Not just the names of those attending, but their most likely motives and what they would be reporting on. There was a handy script on another page, as well, just in case.

Charlie nodded, used to the role by now.

The schedule that Drumknott made for Lord Vetinari included short breaks so that his lordship would be able to walk Mr. Fusspot, do his crossword and have his meals and tea on time. The breaks were longer than they had been when he’d started working as his lordship’s secretary, leaving him time to observe the city through his window and visit Leonard in the attic for some time.

“Does he know?” Charlie asked, not leaning on the cane nearly as much as Vetinari usually would at this time of day.

“He pretends that he does not,” Drumknott said. “But he’s been looking forward to it all week.”

A middle-aged woman with flamingo-pink hair and a box of puppies in her arms came up the stairs, every inch of her sensible coat covered in dog hair. The umbrella under her arm was dented in the shape of a bucket. The puppies howled and sniffed the air, no doubt smelling the sausages and apple tarts cooking down in the kitchens.

“If you would come with me, please,” Drumknott said to her. “We’ve already prepared the room.”

Their footsteps had barely faded when Lord Vetinari made his way down the stairs, one hand gripping his cane and an alert look in his eyes. He wasn’t used to Drumknott being gone for this long. And there had been no change in his pace that indicated him holding a tea-tray, nor a stack of files.

“Ah, Havelock;” his aunt said, looking pleased. “There you are.”

Lord Vetinari stopped in his tracks when he saw everyone waiting for him. His aunt grabbed his arm before he could ask any questions. He settled for sighing inwardly instead, indulging in the part of himself that was still a teenager when he saw the look in his aunt’s eyes.

“Break a leg, Charlie,” Madame Meserole said, gesturing at the actor to go inside the Oblong Office. Charlie obeyed, hurrying up the staircase as soon as he’d greeted his lordship and adjusted his own robes.

Drumknott looked around with a pleased glint in his eyes. It was clear that everything was falling very neatly into place, like files in a roomy and sturdy filing box.

“Very good,” said Madame Meserole, grinning. She turned to Vetinari, whose shoulders had relaxed at the faint sound of barking. “Come on, then, Havelock. We’re orchestrated a grand plan to whisk you away for your birthday.”

She led him down the hallway, her purple dress floating just above the stone.

“I’ve made sure that you’ve got an hour where you’ll be undisturbed, my lord,” Drumknott said, opening the door to a room that had once been full of dusty and badly organized files.

Now there was a mattress on the floor where his lordship did his physical therapy exercises and napped on the green lounge chair in between the more taxing appointments. That chair had been covered with a sturdy old quilt so that should the puppies climb it like a mountain, the damage would be somewhat limited. Wuffles had liked to wrestle it. The floor was also covered in several layers of newspapers and there was a bag of treats on top of a side table.

“Oh,” said Vetinari, seeing the box of puppies.

There were all kinds of breeds, some that would grow up to be lapdogs and others that would herd cows. Fluffy and short-haired, big and small.

“Hyacinth Kettle, my lord,” said the woman holding the box. He recognized the pink hair and the bone-pattern on her apron. It had been a long time since he’d done business with her grandmother, who had clearly left her pet-shelter business in her capable hands. “The late Wuffles’ great-grandpuppies no doubt send their love, I’ve made sure that they made their way to good homes.”

The Patrician nodded.

“All but this one,” Hyacinth said, petting a tiny terrier puppy that was wagging his tail so hard that it was a blur. “Decided to wait a bit until he’d met you first.”

“Thank you,” Lord Vetinari said, looking at the puppy. His ears were the same shape at Wuffles’ had been. He stepped closer, adjusting his glasses as he looked at the puppy.

“Well then,” Madame Meserole said, finally letting go of his arm. “As I understand it, the mattress is quite comfortable. And Hyacinth informs me that the puppies are all sweethearts. She’ll upend the box so that the puppies can enjoy their time with you in peace and we’ll leave you to it.”

“I’ll scream if I need anything, will I?” Vetinari joked, handing his cane over to Drumknott. His aunt grinned at him and then nodded at Hyacinth who followed her out of the door. Drumknott put the cane away safely, so it was in reach but not so that the puppies would gnaw on it.

And then he was gone, the door closing shut behind him.

Lord Vetinari went down to his knees as slowly as he could, glad to be able to do so privately. Even if the people that had just left him were utterly trustworthy, he did not want to have to think of smoothing out the pain that would show on his face. Then he lay down on the mattress, which was the good kind that supported his back and hips. The leather straps that kept his stilettoes in place underneath his robes did not budge. Closing his eyes as the puppies approached him, he heard the footsteps outside fade into nothing.

The puppies were deeply curious, all making tiny sounds of interest as they stepped on his robes and stuck their entire faces into his hair.

“Good,” he praised them when they did not bite his fingers and only pushed their snouts into his palm in hope of treats. They climbed all over him, demanding to be petted and licking his ears and playing with each other.

He stroked their soft heads and fur, careful to keep all his movements slow and unthreatening as they grew used to him. Some of them showed off, sitting down without being prompted to do so and preened when he admired their knowledge of informing a human being that they were in fact not holding a weapon in their front paws by lifting them into the air.

Vetinari breathed out, giving out a little laugh.

The puppies barked in response, only it came out as more of a boof than a woof. Some of them cuddled against his shoulders and of his ankles. Others had made it their temporary mission in life to lick his cheeks and ears.

The little terrier puppy bopped him on the nose, having climbed onto his chest. Then the puppy curled up on his chest, right above his heart, making a content little sigh.

“There’ll be sausages downstairs for you,” he promised them all. And let himself sink into the mattress, soaking in the late afternoon sun and happiness.


End file.
